Over/underwhelm – a reaction to trauma triggers and how to weather the storm
The importance of conquering the battle between the internal and external environment
By Sharon Jones | 31st July, 2025 | Researcher; Educator; Speaker; Author ©
Feeling over/underwhelm? Reactions to trauma triggers
Have you ever been so fraught with thoughts and emotions that you were overcome by or fell silent to the external environment around you? When negative lived experiences have been endured and the trauma is held within, anything can trigger such a reaction. With overwhelm being the opposite of underwhelm, the 2 will feel very different as the mind and body reacts to trauma triggers.
During overwhelm, the brain tends to stay in a flight or fright mode, though the negative experience may have been hours or even days beforehand. An overwhelming feeling floods the body with anxiousness and/or negative emotions. This can feel like the weight of the world has become unbearable and things will appear to move too quickly; one may feel like they are drowning or as if they are being swallowed up by the external environment as the inner world becomes chaotic. Self-control quickly diminishes.
On the other hand, with underwhelm, the brain tends to stay in a freeze or collapse mode, again, this could be long after the negative experiences have occurred. An underwhelming feeling, hypothetically speaking, severs the life cord, leaving one disconnected or unmotivated. Whilst one’s presence maybe physical in the moment, the mind will be absent to the external and engaging in something more positive becomes a world away. Nothing else matters.
Overwhelm for me personally, felt like being in a car with too many people on board, with the music up too loud and absolutely no idea of what direction to go in. My mind travelled in the highest gear at the fastest possible speed and it just kept going. In contrast, during underwhelming moments however, my mind and body were not aligned. I would be physically present whilst not in the room at the same time, I had no sense of purpose or belonging, I was lost.
When the body is flushed with strong emotions, a racing heart and rapid breathing or when the opposite is true and a feeling of numbness occurs, the brain isn’t capable of rational thought at that time. This is because trauma is stressful and it impacts the response system, in this instance the lower part of the brain is activated; the part that focusses on survival (Perry, B & Winfrey, O. 2021). Self-awareness can help with engaging the higher order thinking part of the brain.
The importance of self-awareness
Being self-aware is an important step for healing and personal growth; to overcome the embodied negativities. Becoming self-aware is a different story however. The way we act or react is a result of how we have adapted to cope in frightening or dangerous situations. Looking beyond these repeated patterns is no easy task but when starting the journey of self-awareness, it is a must, and introspective reflection is key.
When we engage with a process of reflection we begin to take better care of ourselves. We all know taking care of ourselves is important. Striking a good balance with whatever comes our way is effective for our physical, mental, social, emotional and spiritual selves. Deep reflection will come with practice but to begin with, reflecting on what happens during a storm of emotions, thoughts and behaviours can help to break the cycle of acting and reacting in the same way. It’s not about trying to dodge the storm or avoiding it altogether, it’s about navigating through it and when it’s over, looking back and saying this is how I did that, and asking how was I feeling? Could have I done it differently? It’s about turning a negative into a positive.
Turning the negative into positive
I mentioned my overwhelm as being in a crammed car, going too fast and heading nowhere, instead of pacing the floor or getting annoyed as I usually would in these moments, I allowed my body to meet me where my head was at in a more effective way. I knew the same thing happened time and time again and I desperately wanted it to stop, so I went for a walk, no ordinary walk, instead I went full steam ahead with my legs going as fast as fast as they could carry me. My brain was in the highest gear and I needed to keep up. I allowed my brain to do its’ thing whilst the adrenaline flushed through each step I took but this time I listened to how I was feeling. I began to ask myself why I was feeling the way I did. At first I couldn’t answer my own question but after walking quickly for a couple of miles, my brain shifted down a gear and my body did too, until eventually I was walking at a normal pace. At this point, I turned around and began to walk home. This part of the journey enabled me to engage in a deeper reflection and I began to embody something positive, something more effective.
It wasn’t the same during the underwhelming moments however. That feeling of disconnect would leave me so quiet, I’d be mute. I didn’t want to talk for the sake of talking and I knew I had flatlined. My brain was still noisy during my quiet moments making it hard to reflect on anything. When I truly recognised this, I began to physically separate myself from what was around me. I’d go for a drive, somewhere I hadn’t been before and I’d turn the music up loud to break my thought patterns. I’d feel a sense of emptiness but this empty space was how I learned to reflect on a deeper level. I’d park up, turn the music off and allow my brain and body to sync together as everything around me was uninterrupted and still. This was me beginning to take care of myself; starting that chapter of me, myself and I to heal and to grow.
Practice self-care
Self-care isn’t always as straight forward as taking a hot bath with bubbles or arranging to see friends for example, it’s having the ability to recognise how you feel and saying ‘no’ to previously made plans or completely removing yourself from the outside noise you are coping with. It can at times, appear selfish to those around you, after all, to work on self means putting self first. Developing self-awareness and practicing self-care begins with having self-compassion and there will be days where this isn’t possible and that’s ok.
Self-care is only one part of weathering the storm, whilst it doesn’t replace professional services, it can assist in the journey. New strategies can help to ground you during overwhelm and finding space to create a connection during underwhelm is effective for both mind and body. Everyone is unique and self-care strategies should match that, no matter how it looks.
Your story is your power. The journey you take with this can liberate you; it is your narrative. Taking hold of this narrative unlocks your potential to a fulfilled sense of you; to self-empowerment. Be kind to yourself.
References
Perry, B.D., and Winfrey, O. 2021. What happened to you? Conversations on trauma, resilience, and healing. London: UK, Bluebird.